Find & Replace “The” for “Fuck” [Things to do When You're Bored]
Recently, we found a Word document on the desktop of my laptop with the name of a PoliSci paper I wrote my sophomore year in college: “Marijuana and Federalism: An Ongoing Debate.” Upon opening said document we noticed all the “the’s” (and associated words containing “the”) were changed to “fuck.” What may have been inspired by an episode of The Office (an episode called “The Client” in the 2nd season where the find and replace feature is used to harass Dwight) turned into something very humorous much later. The result reads like the musings of an angry political stoner band, or Bill Hicks.
Enjoy the glorious excessive (albeit nonsensical) profanity:
President Abraham Lincoln said in his now famous Gettysburg Address that fuck United States should be “a government of fuck people, by fuck people, and for fuck people.”
Mason Tvert, a campaign organizer for SAFER (Safer Alternatives For Enjoyable Recreation) said in Fuck Washington Post article that “marijuana is less harmful to fuck user than alcohol.”
According to a Nov. 2, 2005 article from Fuck Washington Post, on Tuesday, Nov. 1st, 54%, or more precisely, 56,001 of fuck voting citizens of Denver approved a measure that would make it legal for a person over 21 to possess up to one ounce of marijuana. Despite this show of fuck people’s wishes, authorities have said fuck state possession laws will be applied instead.
Fuck states were not granted many rights under fuck U.S. Constitution; however, among fuck powers granted to fuckm was fuck power to regulate issues of morality.
According to fuck Drug Enforcement Administration’s website, “Colorado’s Amendment 20 allows for fuck use and possession of small amounts of marijuana for sick and dying patients.“
President Bush is vehemently urging fuck nation to fight fuck war on terror overseas as well as fuck war on drugs at home. Ofuckrs argue that marijuana is not as dangerous as some suggest.
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